Defining Good Men
"Harmless man is not a good man. A good man is a very dangerous man who has that under voluntary control, civilized and disciplined."
Dr. Jordan B. Peterson
As American society slowly disintegrates into the socialist abyss, we can point to the assault on men as a key pillar the Feminist Movement agenda. Schools now teach that men are oppressors and aggressors, so little boys are programmed to 'act more feminine' or 'abandon their aggressions.' When combined with the Leftist agenda that promotes that gender is either non-existent OR it is a choice, no wonder our little boys (and little girls) grow up with such unbelievable anxiety, guilt and depression.
Little boys in particular are being constantly reminded that they have to atone for being little boys. So many of the women that impose this thought process are the teachers that they admire and the mothers that they depend on, so it's quite easy to understand why we see so many weak, confused young men in society. They never had a chance. The absence of a strong father in the home allows for the erosion of masculine qualities that a healthy society needs to thrive, prosper and grow.
We see men today who immerse themselves in video games for hours on end, often bonding with other men as they escape the reality of having to deal with those who shun them and judge them. We see men who are impulsive and passive aggressive who avoid all attempts at chivalry. They are selfish and want instant gratification via 'hookups' with no commitment to the women they want. They lash out in immaturity, petulance and selfishness.
And the young women are responding in kind. After growing up being programmed that women are as good or better at men in everything, many young women have become insufferable and miserable. They use political correctness to aggressively attack men and hold them to unrealistic standards of being 'less man and more feminine.' They are selfish and overly demanding and want relationships where they alone are in control. There are a record number of young women who are coming out as gender confused, non-binary or transgender. At the same time, there are a record number of young women who suffer from depression and anxiety.
There is a phenomenon where women in their late 20s/early 30s are abandoning the childish men their own age and marrying much older, more mature and established men. With them (Gen X men), there is more stability, defined character, a sense of sacrifice and compromise and discipline. That’s because these older men...act like MEN!
While I am using sweeping generalities to make my point, there are always exceptions to the rule. So before we give up all hope, I'd like to define what I think a strong, stable man should embody:
Faith in God.
A man who has a relationship with God and actively pursues truth through the Bible is an anchored man. Having learned the important requirements of being a man and husband through the Bible gives this man a head's up against the wickedness of society.
Integrity.
A man who lives his life according to a code of integrity is a stable one. Life is full of choices, many of which lead men down the path of wickedness and selfishness. A man of integrity steers himself toward honor, dignity and the protection of him, his wife and his children.
Communication.
A worthy man is not afraid to express himself or his feelings with others. Being vulnerable, admitting to being wrong and being able to admit to mistakes then communicate with his wife is invaluable. Listening deeply for understanding and patiently asking questions to gain better understanding is an important component in a successful marriage.
Masculinity.
A man should never feel embarrassed to be a man. There is a saying that "weak men create hard times. Hard times create strong men." I assert that the cultural assault on masculinity has resulted in weak men. While I am not advocating for a World War so 'hard times makes strong men,' I am saying that we can no longer allow for the destruction of the masculine.
Physical health.
A man should get in the gym and exercise. I'm not saying every man should become a Schwarzenegger-style body builder, but we've got to get off the couch and push our bodies in a regular and disciplined manner. We are suffering from lack of testosterone and exercise releases all the good hormones in our body.
Good Mental health.
A man suffers from the same stresses, fears and anxiety as a woman does. The pressure we feel can be crippling, debilitating, and exhausting. Women and children are loved unconditionally. But men are alone in the world. We are loved conditionally except by God. This can lead to a mental health crisis, so I advocate that men seek wise counsel from professional therapists, coaches or mentors. We've got to be able to deal with a wicked world that constantly tells us that we aren't good enough and we should routinely reach out to attend to our mental health.
Maybe some segment of women desire a weak, feminine man that they can push around and dominate and that is why we see the Destruction of Men everywhere. The Feminist Movement is more one of hating men than actually achieving equality today. The result is the 'trendy hipster' who runs around with a handlebar mustache, ear stretchers, a tattoo sleeve and his gender pronouns pinned to his lapel.
And we also know that MEN are needed in the home in order to teach our boys how to become men. The social experiment of the 'Sexual Revolution' where we grew up listening to TV Commercials like the famous one from the perfume company, Enjoli that said:
I can bring home the bacon.
Fry it up in a pan.
And never let you forget you're a man.
The idea behind the jingle is that a woman can work all day, then make dinner, then be a tiger in bed (at least that's how I took it). But when you think about it, isn't that exhausting for the woman?
What would happen if her husband worked his butt off, got home and started chopping the chicken up while his wife was chopping vegetables and they made dinner together. They took turns getting the kids to soccer practice and then got home at a decent hour so they could spend 45 minutes on the sofa sharing about each other's day before they retired to the bedroom and pray before bed and maybe snuck a "quickie" in.
The next morning, the husband could make the kid's lunches while the wife finishes up her steaming workout video, then while she puts the grocery list together for tonight's dinner, he sneaks his workout in. They could shower together after they get the kids on the bus and read 10 pages of personal development before getting in their cars to head off to work.
You think this is unrealistic? Well, I dare you to try it for 30 days and I'm guessing you'll end the month with more energy, feel closer to your spouse, have more sex and less anxiety and feel more fulfilled in your marriage and life.
And why?
Because you were a MAN and not a mouse. Being a MAN and not letting the world stomp the MAN out of you is your choice. Go take it back and see what happens.